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The beginning of the end

How do I look like this in photos?!?! I see a tall, balanced, beautiful woman when I look in the mirror!!! Who is this Biggest Loser wannabe?!?!

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Well, I know what I look like as a fit size 12, and now I have a clear image of what I look like right now as a obese size 18 (probably more like a 20, but I refuse to buy bigger sizes.).

So all I can do is focus and work hard from here. This week is insane, but I’m going to try to hit LA Fitness to re-sign up on Friday morning and then I’ll have somewhere to go run in the morning when the weather’s crap and I am going to start hitting spinning classes again after work. (I ❤ spinning!)

Now I need to get thru this crazy weekend without going off the wagon. Tonight I’m having veggie sushi and edamame. I will miss a nice glass of plumb saki and chilling out to the smooth sounds of Ben Sharkey an Chris Mann won’t be quite the same sipping on water, but this is the reality of my life for now.

I’m doing this for me!

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You’re only a loser if you quit trying

So I’m back! Sort of!

I’ve been struggling for months to get back on track with my weight loss. To make my journey harder I thought I’d just throw all the rules out the window and eat like a bear going into hibernation for most of the winter. Brilliant idea! That resulted in packing the pounds back on to my heaviest weight ever. I know I feel better when I am losing weight and working out, so why do I keep sabotaging myself?

So I am back to eating a heathy vegetarian diet. I am trying to get back into my marathon training, but I feel like everything from the waist down is full of lead! Ugh! Time and persistence… That’s what I keep telling myself.

So I am actually feeling good enough mentally to focus on this. I hate being an emotional eater!

I’m aware that eventually I’ll need to kick my cream with coffee addiction. For know I am using agave and going easy on the cream to keep the calories down.

So follow along on my journey. Root me on! I need the support.

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